紀念

Not a problem, just woke up in the wee hours, still in daze and I am all fresh and alive all over again! Can’t literally spelt out what I’d gone through over the weekend, the last Chuseok I am ever going to remember and actually bother to remember. When I first came to realize how meaningless and futile it all came to be, when I see vividly that diminishing ‘self’, all strivelled and almost close to death, suddenly all became clear to me. Whatever will be will be, I might have magnified the whole episode, I may have been too emotionally and way too sentimentally involved and immersed so much so that I could only allow myself to wallow in self pity and making that someone bigger than in real life. Still not quite sure what this all means to me, perhaps a short revival or if optimistic enough, it’s just waking up from a long lasted dream. And however mesmerizing it may be, it is merely a moment of virtual reality.

相信我真的努力了好久,就因為太久了,竟忘了可以不必那么努力,可以不再努力了。而且有些事情本來就是任自己再怎么努力也不會有收獲的。所以發現原來還可以努力不讓自己繼續努力下去。終于有松了一口氣,起碼是喘口氣的力量了。感覺,真的輕松多了。

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